Konoha's Slasher
by David Archangel
Summary: Naruto is insane, he is locked but then set free and taught and experimented on by orochimaru. well now he is back in konoha and ready to become a ninja. Here he will find love, and acceptance, and maybe even his sanity. NOw come and read his tale as konoha' slasher
1. Chapter 1

**Konoha's Slasher**

**I only own my stories**

**Hello my adoring fans it is I the great archangel, well here is a story that is sure to be a treat, what if naruto went insane, but gained a thirst for knowledge and know everything.**

Naruto uzumaki container of the nine tailed demon fox was sitting in a white room grinning, sitting all around him were books, ranging from books on the mind to books on the human body.

He was grinning and laughing like a lunatic, flipping through a book before tossing it into the pile of already read books.

Suddenly a knock came from his door.

"Who is it" said naruto with insanity

"Naruto do you wish to be free" came a short hissing breath

"Yes" was the short reply

"Then how would you like to come work for me to better konoha" asked the same hissing voice

"Oh this should be fun" said naruto with a glimmer of something terrible in his eyes

Naruto didn't know he would be gone for several years.

**Seven Years later**

"Orochimaru how could you do this" asked hiruzen as he sat in the remains of orochimarus lab after the explosion.

"Don't you have bigger worries like how poor naruto-kun is doing, the poor boy his mind is just so rattled but he somehow is even more genius than I, also there is the rate of his growth in the art of combat, he would have been the greatest vessel for me" said orochimaru with fake sadness

"Where is he" demanded hiruzen

"He is in that cell over there but if you want to get to him in time, you would have to let me escape" said orochimaru

"Go" said hiruzen looking down with his eyes shadowed

Orochimaru meanwhile sat there with a look of mild surprise.

"I said leave, I would rather have naruto then a traitor like you" said hiruzen

Orochimaru just left with a visible smirk.

Hiruzen ran to the cell that orochimaru had pointed out and busted down the door but he was immediately met with the stench of death and decay.

"Oh hiruzen-jiji, where is oji-san" asked naruto

"Naruto, thank goodness your okay" said hiruzen

"Why wouldn't I be, Orochi-oji gave me everything I wanted or needed, he even gave me his sword" said naruto showing off the kusanagi

Now hiruzen was worried, why would orochimaru give the kusanagi away so easily.

"Naruto why did orchimaru give you that sword" asked hiruzen

"Because it wouldn't let him wield it after I started training with it" said naruto with insanity still clear in his eyes.

"Naruto my boy what did he give you" asked hiruzen

"All the knowledge and training I could ask for but we were interrupted because we had to start experimenting and injecting me with different things but then we started training to be a ninja and I can do everything madara, hashirama, and the sage can do." Said naruto

"Naruto can you really do all that" asked hiruzen with shock and awe written all over his face.

"And oh so much more, it makes me wanna break into song and dance" said naruto

"…" hiruzen waited for naruto to start

"Any who why are you here" asked naruto

"I came to stop orochimaru" said hiruzen with sweatdrop

"Did you do it" asked naruto

"Yes, but I was too late it seems" said hiruzen sadly

"Well if you want you can make me a ninja, I promise not to maim comrades" said naruto with a twisted smile

Hiruzen was too exhausted to think clearly and lead naruto to his office to sign the papers and give him his headband.

The next day would be a terrible awakening for konoha


	2. Chapter 2

**Konoha's Slasher**

**I only own my stories**

Naruto our insane little protagonist came walking out of an abandoned part of konoha that had many warehouses and buildings, some were banks others libraries, some were forges, and some were abandoneed clan compounds from wiped out clans.

Naruto could only consider all the fun he would have.

"So much fun to have but only one little ol me, well I can fix that. Shadow clone jutsu" yelled naruto as thousands of clones came forth.

"Guys lets build a wall around our playground, bsure to put security seals all over the walls and then start exploring everything read everything in here but be sure to check the abandoned compound and the uzumaki embassy" said the original

"Hai oyabun" yelled the clones in unison

"Now I am off to see what I can learn today, and maybe freak out the locals" said naruto cheerily

**Three Hours Later**

"This library is pathetic, I already know all of this" said naruto

It was during his bored rant that he came up with an idea, Pranks.

**First victim**

Sasuki uchiha, the last surviving uchiha loyal to konoha, was walking towards her training ground.

Despite how amazing her morning was she couldn't help but feel that something was wrong, her first mistake of the day was not looking where she stepped.

Sasuki placed her foot on a seal that was shaped like a party popper.

Soon she was engulfed in confetti.

When all the confetti cleared away it showed sasuki covered head to toe in the little paper stings.

"Who does this" demanded sasuki loudly

Getting no reply she growled and continued her way to her training ground after taking all the confetti off.

Seeing nothing wrong and feeling like nothing else was going to happen sasuki began her training.

Everything was going perfectly fine, at least until it was time to do her last jutsu.

"Phoenix fire jutsu" said sasuki throwing her shuriken that soon caught on fire but poor sasuki never saw the seals on the shuriken that caused the jutsu to start chasing her.

Sasuki took off running cursing who ever caused this but when she tried to run out of the uchiha district she was hit with tar and then feathers.

"I HATE YOU" yelled sasuki

"MUAHAHAHAHAHHA" came a laugh that sent a chill down sasuki's spine

**Second Victim**

Konohamaru was running after his grandfather trying to assassinate him.

He was almost to him when the figure of his grandfather turned around with demonic looking eyes.

"**Konohamaru, I have grown tired of your ridiculous games, as of now it ends**" said hiruzen as he started forming handsigns.

Next thing konohamaru knew he was buried up to his neck in dirt and the form of hiruzen was replaced with the kyuubi.

Konohamaru let out a scream that alerted ebisu to his location but when konohamru saw him he didn't see his sensei, no he saw a terrible ogre.

Konohamaru passed out.

"**MUAHAHAHAHA**" came a demonic laugh that spooked ebisu so bad he fainted.

"HAHAhAha" came the same laugh that had haunted sasuki

**Third victim**

Hiruzen was having a great day he had finished all the paperwork for the day and was now reading his icha icha.

That is when his secretary came in holding thousands of papers, not believing his eyes he put his hands together.

"KAI" yelled hiruzen disrupting the illusion

This revealed naruto holding several paint balloons which he proceeded to sling at the third.

Hiruzen using his honed ninja reflexes to dodge but when he looked at where naruto had been he was gone only being replaced by his secretary who had several people behind her all holding a couple thousand sheets of paper.

"Kai" said hiruzen

This unfortunately did not fade out, hiruzen seeing all the paperwork consequently caused hiruzen the oldest running hokage and fierce warrior of the third shinobi war fainted.

"This wasn't as fun as I thought" said naruto

With that naruto returned to his new area of play.

**Naruto's lair thing**

Naruto arrived at his new base of operations and began going through everything the clones had done, and if he wasn't so insane then he might have been impressed.

Naruto spent a long time having his clones go over everything.

When they were finally done he had to attend the academy for graduation.

Naruto walked to the academy and the whole way there he received looks of fear from the villagers.

"Oh no one wants to play after last time, well that is fine" said naruto out loud

Naruto continued until he was in the classroom the hokage had told him to go to.

When he entered the chunnin inside that had a scar on his nose looked pale as a ghost.

"Oh my didn't expect to see you again, tell me how is your friend mizuki after that mob attack" said naruto with a cruel smirk

"You know very well he is dead" said iruka bitterly

"It was his own fault, he attacked and I defended" said naruto

"But you killed him after you disabled him" said iruka

"Wouldn't you have done the same to me, even if I was hollering and screaming" said naruto with odd sense of sanity about him

Iruka just turned away at that, he knew he would have done the same.

"Now excuse me while I find a seat" said naruto as he walked around until he sat down by sasuki uchiha

"Hello uchiha-chan, how did you like my prank yesterday" asked naruto

Sasuki turned to naruto with murder in her eyes, she swung and hit him but he burst into a cloud of smoke.

"Missed me missed me, now you gotta kiss me" said naruto on her other side

Sasuki immediately turned but when she did she was met with a pair of lips crashing into her own.

"Oh my, they are quite soft" said naruto

Sasuki meanwhile was fighting a blush.

Naruto thinking she was done playing decided to move and sat down next to shika nara.

"Hello" said naruto

"Your insane aren't you" she said instead of asked

"Very much so, now tell me how do you get your hair to stay like that" naruto asked looking at the spiked ponytail

"How do you get yours to do that" she asked looking at his flat hair.

"It just does it" he said

"Same here" she said as she started trying to fall asleep.

Naruto noticed this and came up with a funny idea.

He reached his hand down and pinched her on the butt.

Shika shot up with a squeak and a blush.

"No sleep for you today" said naruto

This caused him to receive a small glare from shika and a angry glare from choji.

"Watch yourself bub, I saw her first" said choji

Naruto turned to him with complete seriousness.

"I will kill you" said naruto looking choji in the eyes.

Choji stared directly back but regretted it immediately, all he saw was a cruel insanity, with a large amount of blood lust.

After getting his point across naruto turned to shika seeing her asleep, he smiled as he reached down again and gave her another pinch.

She squeaked again.

"Now now, hime kage, no sleeping today" said naruto

Giving him a stare she soon sorted out what he said before she blushed, she just nodded and leaned back staring forward.

Naruto moved to a new seat and sat next to the hyuuga heiress.

"Hi" said naruto

"What do you want you loon" asked hinata

"Your whispering eye" naruto whispered into her ear.

This made her eyes go wide and blush.

"Silence you scoundrel, I will destroy you if you say another word" said hinata with a blush

Naruto smirked and put an arm over her and pulled her close.

"Now now, is that any way to treat your new friend, especially when he is as sexy as me" said naruto with a crazy smile

Hinata blushed from the contact but didn't move, instead she subconsciously moved closer.

"That's much better" said naruto

Hinata just blushed heavier with a small scowl on her face.

Naruto soon let go and moved to another seat, and sat down next to the inuzuka heiress.

"Hello" said naruto

"How you doing foxy" said kira with a smile

"You know your pheromones are all over the place right" said naruto

"I can't help it" she said with a blush

Naruto leaned in and whispered.

"I could always help quell those pheromones" said naruto planting a small kiss on kira's cheek then nibbling on her ear.

Kira couldn't help when her face went straight crimson.

Now the other girls naruto had flirted with were now glaring at kira all with different variations.

Shika had the your troublesome glare of the nara.

Sasuki had the patented the You dare think you're a match for me glare of the uchiha.

Hinata had the hyuuga's usual superiority glare.

Kira never noticed though as she tried to kiss naruto only to find him gone.

When she tried to find him she couldn't see him anywhere.

That is until she looked next to shina.

Then she began giving a predatory glare to shina.

"Hello little butterfly" said naruto

"Greetings" said shina in a monotone

Naruto frowned before he came up with an idea.

"You should show more emotion before I do something drastic" said naruto with some humor in his voice

"Like what" shina asked curiously raising an eyebrow

Naruto smiled before he did the unthinkable, he grabbed her breast.

Shina went red like a stoplight, while the other girls felt their jaws drop.

"Why did you do that, don't you know who I am" asked shina

"Yeah the heiress to the aburame clan, the ones that have bugs that live in them" said naruto

"Then why touch me" asked shina dejectedly

"Cause your cute, and you will soon be mine" said naruto

This caused shina to blush and and gain a small smile, she leaned over and gave naruto a small peck on the cheek.

Now it was naruto's turn to blush.

"That was actually quite pleasant" said naruto

Naruto got up and walked out the class room, ignoring all the looks he was getting.

Naruto went to his lair or as he likes to call naruto land.

Waiting there he started researching why he would gain that feeling, and what it was. If he was to listen to his books then this was known as love.

This would require some more in depth research, so he would aske the hokage what his team was and hope it was with one of the girls.

Naruto took off and shushined to the hokages office.

**Hokage's office**

"Naruto what are you doing here" asked hiruzen

"I am here to see what team I will be on" said naruto

"NO, what are you doing here, you disappeared, where have you been" said hiruzen in shock

"Well when you raided orochimaru-oji's base you came and took me and made me a ninja for this village" said naruto

Hiruzen then felt his head start hurting as he vaguely remembered the events of orochimarus base raiding.

"I don't have a team for you" said hiruzen

"Then what will I do" asked naruto

"I don't know naruto, I didn't even know you were back" said hiruzen

"Do I have a sensei" asked naruto

"No, but I can find you one" said hiruzen

"Alright but I may need more than one" said naruto

"Why is that" asked hiruzen

"My bloodlines" said naruto with a deranged grin

Hiruzen sat there for a few minutes before it registered in his head.

"WHAT" yelled hiruzen

**Tell me guys what you think some of naruto's bloodlines should be leave them in reviews**


End file.
